Contentment

I'm waiting for my music ministry to move ahead.
I'm waiting to meet my future husband.
I'm waiting for a car.
I'm waiting for a spark of songwriting creativity.
I'm waiting for a job.
I'm waiting for a more clear direction in life in general.

But, reading my own words, I also see that I have all the time in the world to spend with Jesus. Everything seems so pointless, endless, repetitive... but I have so many opportunities throughout the day to simply "be" with Jesus. If nothing else, I am learning to be content. To put it in God's hands instead of trying to take control because I don't approve of where I am. I don't know why he's making me wait for so many things. I don't know if it even has anything to do with me. I just know that this is my time with Him...

Now.
Without a career draining me emotionally and physically.

Now.
As a single person who can FULLY focus on God.

Now.
Right where God wants me to be.

I recently wrote a short song. Some of the lyrics goes like this:

Thank you Jesus
For not giving me my way
Thank you Jesus
That all I have is today
Thank you Jesus
That life isn't fair
Thank you Jesus
For not granting this prayer.

As Francis Shaeffer so wisely said "Nothing would terrify me more than to know that I could ask for anything today and get it. Because I don't know enough."
I trust in God, being all-knowing and loving me so deeply, as opposed to myself, because i am finite, and there's simply no way I could know what's best for myself.
Here am I Lord.
Send me.

Your faithful daughter,
Olivia

Cooking

Okay, so cooking is something that I did NOT want to try for the longest time. Why? Well, because I had made little dishes before and enjoyed it, but I feared becoming domesticated... I wanted to love a busy life, and had my mind set to be a busy person, constantly out of the house... which I still love doing, but, hey, don't be afraid to try something out.
Anyway, my mom got busy and started needing help so I started doing almost all of the cooking. At first, I was so overwhelmed and just panicky all the time about it... but, seriously people. If you will go slow, clean as you cook, and start with simple recipes (Rachael Ray :) you will LOVE it! It's so relaxing, it takes zero skill... oh my. I just love it. Love, love, LOVE IT!
So there is my latest rant... I am done now. Now go cook something! Don't be afraid to love it like I was... I was missing out. :)

Remember, remember, the fifth of November...

So, it's late and honestly I should be doing homework, but you know what? I worked my butt off today and I'm DONE. Yes, I may regret it tomorrow, but I need a freaking break so I'm taking it. Thinking about watching V for Vendetta tonight. ;) The language is pretty strong in it and I recommend TVG (TV Guardian - inexpensive and worth it!) to watch it, but it has such a great message.

I'm going to go get a cup of tea and enjoy my evening. Good night Blog.

-Olivia

Brain Break

I just got done doing a week's worth of algebra and reading an hour of "City of God" from St. Augustine and my brain is kind of done... but I have another hour of reading to do. :( So I'm taking a brain break and writing a blog! Yay!

What to say? Ummm I'm wearing a brown turtleneck, I'm eating chicken for lunch, I'm hungry allll the time, I waste way too much time on facebook and I'm catching up with God a lot lately cause I just haven't been spending enough time with Him. Anyway.. That's it!!

-Olivia

You know, in a way I think it's easier to answer the hard, deep questions. Questions that make you really have to think to come up with an answer. Because when someone looks at you and says, "How do you get saved?", "Is there such a thing as a second chance?" or "Who is Jesus?" your mind is so freaking overwhelmed with the millions of different ways you could answer such a question, that you don't know where to start....

I was recently asked such a question and I was so scared that I might say something wrong, put it the wrong way, so I said a quick prayer asking for guidance and just started talking... at first it all felt like a confusing mixture of a thousand different points but slowly I came around to saying the most important things, and it started flowing, and I concluded my thought... and was successful in helping this person to understand. Anyway!

What else is new? Well, I recently started the maker's diet and have lost eight pounds. :) Just twelve more to go!

Ooh! I heard an interesting question the other day "what happens if you're going at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on?"

And that's about it! Okay - bye!

-Olivia

Food and music

Well, last night me and my mom saw Julie & Julia together. It was wonderful. Funny, romantic, and inspiring. Afterward, we went to the cheesecake factory and caught up with each other about life over bread, a bowl of pasta, and red velvet cheesecake. It's funny how you can be in the same house with someone like your mom all the time and have no idea what's going on in the each other's life.
I don't have long, I need to get started on lunch (hamburgers and potato wedges - but for supper, BLT's!:), but as far as music goes:

Okay, I know I say this a lot, but I think I'm finally about to record a full length album. No, really. Maybe it will fall through like so many other things in the past, but God's timing is always right, and I'm not about to give up. Other than that, I will be singing a special (one of my originals!) at my church soon. :) Oh, and I'm picking up on harmonica! Hehe! It's very easy, and very fun.

Okay, time to make lunch. And to the few people in the world who actually read this blog, please leave a comment!

-Olivia

Cooking

I've been so obsessed with cooking lately - something I never thought I would care for. Lately I've made greek salad, basil pasta with mussels, honey mustard cutlets, green chili enchiladas, deep-fried ravioli, and buffalo chicken strips. Most of my recipes are from Rachael Ray and Jamie Oliver. It's so much fun!!! I could spend hundreds of $$ just in kitchen supplies too. So happy to have found yet another hobby.

More later

-Olivia

1 Corinthians 10: 31

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all to the glory of God.

~*~ LOVED ~*~

Despite my imperfection, I can cast my anxieties on Him, because He cares for me. (1 Peter 5:7)

Despite my shortcomings, He has loved me with an everlasting love, He has drawn me with loving-kindness. (Jeremiah 31:3)

Despite my all my flaws - all my sin compared to HIS unconditional love - Mostly what God does is love me
(Ephesians 5:2 The Message)

♥

1,000 miles from home

I'm sitting in the campground office not ten minutes from the badlands. In fact, there's an incredible view of them right outside our camping spot. We hiked for four hours through it today and it was SOOO hot - My arms and face are totally burnt! Ha ha! Anyway - we're in South Dakota, obviously, and it took us three long days of driving to get here. It's rather lovely to be able to relax for an afternoon and not have to spend it in the car. I've got like seven books shoved in the car for the road - so excited to catch up on my reading! :)
Tomorrow we will be seeing Mt. Rushmore and traveling to our next campground. About a ninety minute drive, as opposed to six hours. What a relief.
Yesterday I walked up to a picnic table right in front of the view of The Badlands in our campsite and just prayed and tried to "be" before I took out my pen and paper and wrote a new song. :) Amazing words are written when you are truly focused on God!!!
There are a thousand little detail I could write, but... yeah, they're not that interesting. ;) he!he!

I'm sure I will be writing again soon!!!!

Livvy~*~

Psalm 34:1

I will bless the Lord at all times,
His praise shall continuously be in my mouth.

God is a God of NEWNESS! :)

Have you ever reached that point in your life (probably more than once) where you felt like you were stagnating? I've been struggling to come out of that point for over a year now. God is opening so many doors here lately, and it's scary. There's the possibility of moving, getting a band, recordings are looking more affordable... All I can do is pray that God bring the next chapter of my life into play because I'm so ready for it.

Every time I give something to Him and follow Him He never lets me down. We think that if we don't give ourselves some flexibility outside the Christian walk to bend the rules then we'll never have any fun, but I think that if we would just listen and follow hard after Him we could see what an amazing adventure this walk with Christ really is!! It's hard to come to the realization that God didn't just make the ten commandments because He could. Each one if for our protection and happiness. We have to realize that if something is not 100% pleasing to Him it cannot possibly lead to happiness (C.S.Lewis "The Problem of Pain).

Anyway! On a lighter note - me and my family are packing our bags for a LONG vacation out west (a whole month!) and will be leaving this coming Monday! Fun stuff - and frankly, everyone here could use a vacation, haha!!!

Later peeps

Livvy-*-^*<*>~*~

Isaiah 43:19

Behold, I will do something new,
Now it will spring forth,
Will you not be aware of it?
I will even make a roadway in the wilderness
Rivers in the desert.

Mary and Martha

Possibly my favorite story in the bible is in Luke, when Jesus and his disciples go into the home of Mary and Martha to rest, and while Martha is in the kitchen, stressing out and trying to prepare dinner, Mary is sitting at Jesus' feet, listening intently to his every word.

I can be so bad about using my busy schedule to fill up my time and keep my mind occupied so I don't have to think about all the stuff going on in life. Lately, God's really been teaching me the art of simply being - being with Him. That art of not accomplishing anything by doing the best thing you can, which is spending time with him. Taking walks with Him outside alone, reading his word, sitting and staring out a window while silently pouring your heart out to Him. Just to be able to look at all the crap going on in life and say "I know you're in control - it is well with my soul."

I have a lot on my mind right now, and my heart is very heavy today, and I'm scared, so I'm going to take my own advice and go spend some quality time with my first love! :)

Olivia~

Luke 10:38-42

³⁸Now as they were traveling along, He entered a village; and a woman named ^AL)">(AL)Martha welcomed Him into her home.

³⁹She had a sister called ^AM)">(AM)Mary, who was ^AN)">(AN)seated at the Lord's feet, listening to His word.

⁴⁰But ^AO)">(AO)Martha was distracted with all her preparations; and she came up to Him and said, "Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to do all the serving alone? Then tell her to help me."

⁴¹But the Lord answered and said to her, "^AP)">(AP)Martha, Martha, you are ^AQ)">(AQ)worried and bothered about so many things;

⁴²^AR)">(AR)but only one thing is necessary, for ^AS)">(AS)Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her."

giving it to GOD

I'm reading a fascinating book from C.S.Lewis right now called "The Problem of Pain".

In one chapter, he brought up the common question: "Are we born sinful in such a way that we are destined to be terrible creatures and it's not our fault, or IS it our fault that we sin constantly?" He continued to describe us as spoiled brats. It's really interesting if you think about it that way. On one hand, no, it is not your fault that you were given the freedom to do whatever you want and were therefore raised in a spoiled environment, but it is your fault that you chose to do wrong, because no matter how you are raised God has still wired you to know right from wrong, being made in HIS image. He gave us free will and we abused it. And because we've been raised in this "spoiled" environment, no matter how much we think that we have killed that rebellious spirit in us that doesn't seek God, it is still alive and still needs to continue "dying".

Other than that - I just got back from a week long trip to North Carolina with my dad! We climbed four mountains in the Black Mountain Range and went canoing too. I gained six pounds from all the junk I ate, but I'm getting back on a good healthy diet today. :)

Since this week is spring break, my teen group has been doing something together every day. Today we're supposed to do Ultimate Frisby all day but it's wet, so I don't know how they're gonna adjust their plans yet... Everybody there is so awesome! I just love hanging out with all of 'em...

Ba! It's late.. I need to do my devotions and start on lunch.

later

Livvy~

Random thoughts

Hey ya'll!

I haven't blogged in a while... Honestly, that's because there isn't a whole lot to catch up on. I haven't been doing anything. Our mountain climb got postponed a couple weeks since I got sick, and I haven't gotten out of the house just to hang with a friend since December. :/ Luckily, that's about to change though!

So my friend Alee is in a school play tomorrow and I'm hoping to go to that and Monday I get to see my friend Emily. :) Yay!

I have so many people that love me... I am very blessed. I was doing devotions the other day and asking God if He would bring "the one" into my life sometime soon, and over the past couple weeks, He's really spoken to my heart and just said, "For this season of life Olivia, I need you to fall in love with ME." So I turned to the gospels and have been reading through them and focusing on getting to know who Jesus is. It's the most intimate thing EVER to read about Him and focus on His love and then close your bible and pray knowing that your talking to that very person. It's like the very key to falling in love with Him is focusing on how much He loves you. Of course it's because that our desire as people (okay - as a girl:) is to be loved compassionately and deeply. How can you not love someone that loves you more than you will ever understand?
Showing love has been a huge challenge for me for a long time and something God's been working on in me lately. In fact, I was having such a hard time forgiving someone who hurt me time and time again that I sat down in tears and just begged God to give me the strength and show me how to love the unlovable.... and He said one word: "Agape."... It's one of the Greek words for love. It's the type of love that you choose to give. It has nothing to do with what the person has done, it is purely a choice to love no matter what. Agape was demonstrated on a cross. The perfect picture of selflessness. That night was a very painful, very important breaking point for me. So many times we ask God to work on our hearts, and we're very honest and sincere, we simply don't understand the cost. It's like there's this wall of protection around you the first time that you really feel on fire for God. But the longer you follow God, the more that wall is torn down, and you see the cost of being the only one standing for truth - and yet the beauty of it too.
Okay... that's enough rambling for now. I've got to go! haha!

~Olivia

Romans 12:2
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.

Getting Fit 4 Du Mountains!!

Hey!

Wow.. it's been forever since I posted... it's really busy around here!

So, I am now actually getting UP when my alarm goes off at six o'clock every morning and I'm trying to get myself in bed at ten every night... which hasn't been happening.

Me and my dad are going to go climb two or three mountains in the Black Mountain Range in about a week. We've been eating really good and working out really hard for about three weeks now to prepare! :)

Other than that, not a lot is going on. Just the same ol' routine around the house every day, but I'm learning to love it. God has blessed me SO much!

~*~Olivia~*~

Galatians 6:9
Let us not lose heart in doing good,
for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.

Sleepless nights

I have been having a hard time fixing my sleep here lately. I think I've set my alarm for 6 a.m. for the past week and literally listen to it go off for 60 seconds straight while I'm half asleep, and then get up at eight or nine, haha! Anyway, last night I was hyper and wide awake at midnight, and Stephen (my older brother and my buddy!) was in bed trying to get to sleep. So I sat at the end of his bed and kept the poor guy up forever just talking to him and telling him how board I was, and telling him stories and splashing a little water on his face when I got really bored a couple of times... and he just took it all like a good brother...he cracks me up. We must have stayed up till one in the morning.

Well, this morning, as usual, I ignored my alarm and woke up at nine o'clock in my parent's bed (they're out of town...good times...good times) and I turned on the TV and watched the Rachael Ray show and drank two cups of coffee which motivated me (the caffeine, that is) to work out for an hour. And, so, I'm sitting here and desperately need to shower and then make lunch for me and my siblings. I'm also so hoping that the Bon Jovi DVD I ordered comes in the mail today! :-)
FYI - I'm back in the studio, and putting a band together. Please keep my ministry in your prayers.
That's all for now!!

~Livvy

Ephesians 3:20, 21

Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen.

Music! Music! MINISTRY!!

Okay, updates...

My parents are going to be gone Monday through Wednesday (?). I have to start school back up Monday, both for myself and for my sibling. Yuck. However!! I'm hoping to start working on an album (Yes, you heard correctly dear friends!:) in March... Hopefully! I really need everybody's prayers here. Finances are not looking the best for my family lately which will greatly affect whether or not it happens. : /

I'm finally starting to pick back up on guitar and I'm so excited! I'm really hoping to join a church and a songwriting group and find a band soon to start touring around this time next year, so please pray for that too! Because we don't have any $$ we're counting on people to help us out without counting on anything in return so there is absolutely no guaranty anything will happen.

I'm trying not to get a cold here. I feel gross off and on. Must stop the sugar intake!

Well I guess that's about it. Tomorrow it's back to lots of music practice, lots of cooking, lots of school, and lots of quiet time with God as always!!

Later~

Livvy